DEAR WORLD | What is on your heart that you want the world to know about your kind of grief? This is your day to choose your own topic. Some topic ideas are pregnancy or infertility after loss. Anxiety or PTSD. Forgiveness. Trust. What is it that you want to talk about?
I want the world to understand that this is a global issue. The stories we hear as we talk to each other are frighteningly similar and the way in which we grieve and more importantly allowed to grieve makes a huge difference far beyond the immediate affect on our family.
It extends to the community around us, the people that cross the road to avoid us, to those that would seek to deny the option of a burial or marking the death in a way that is meaningful to the bereaved.
It extends to the workplaces where maternity leave is already seen as an inconvenience and where indifference or cruelty makes it impossible to return to work.
This type of treatment at best can be driven by misguided intentions of preserving parents from harm but at worst it shows utter contempt for the pain they have suffered and then twists the knife for fun.
Bereaved parents don’t need protection like this. They need support and understanding. Our pain is different because it is constrained and in the worst cases punished. This leads to complicated, delayed and disenfranchised grief.
It destroys families, relationships and careers and poisons the well for years to come with fear, anxiety and anger.
It’s a tragedy enough that many of these deaths were preventable had there been proper monitoring, care and taking concerns seriously but to subject all ready broken people to further cruelty is unforgivable.