CREATIVE HEARTWORK | Have you done anything special to memorialize your child? Maybe you got a tattoo or commissioned a piece of art to be created. Maybe you have a special piece of jewellery to remember them by or created a garden.

If I have any memorials then they generally come from someone else.

We have no grave, their urn is kept in our home next to their mortuary photos.

My wife has a tattoo of an infinity symbol stylised as two baby footprints but I have no tattoo. I’m not cool enough to carry one off.

We have a tree planted in their memory but that was a gift from my sister.

We have a polar bear sponsored in their memory by my mother-in-law.

My wife has given me a key ring with pendants for all of our children and a locket with their photos that once unintentionally scared a work friend when she grabbed it from me.

I haven’t created anything physical in their memory. The closest I have come to that is this blog. Writing about their brief lives, their deaths and the memories I have of them. That’s the way I keep them close. Sometimes I read my old posts and they make me cry. Sometimes I’m shocked by the anger vibrating from my words. I read those posts and think back to that day or the days that followed and sometimes that can be a comfort.