SYMBOLS + SIGNS | Do you have a symbol that represents your child? Maybe it is a butterfly, tree or bird etc. Share how you came to find that symbol and what it means to you. Do you believe your children send you signs at all? Have you had any? How did they help you?

Our children are nicknamed cubs as a reference to our silly pet names (that we created as a mickey take of pet names but ended up sticking…). During the pregnancy I sent my wife pictures of bear cubs as part of the anticipation of having twins. Over time the bear cubs became polar bears and that image, like the pet names, stuck.


One of those images would become the symbol for their loss. It would be used on the Facebook post announcing their stillbirth and the fundraising page in their memory.


Every (still)birthday my sister sends me a polar bear related gift to remember them by. I have little bear cub cufflinks to keep them close to me at work.

It’s a nice image to have, a symbol that isn’t a butterfly. Polar bears are solid creatures not fragile beasts that crumble at a simple touch.

For some reason, that’s important to me. That we remember them as they should have been and not as fragile as they were.